Today I Wanna Say Thank You

[متغرب بأمريكا]

Today i wanna say Thank you,
For your friendship thru the years,
For offering your support selflessly,
When i needed someone to dry my tears,
Today i wanna say Thank you,
For you have given me so much of your time,
When my world crashed down around me,
It was you who convinced me things would be fine.
Today i wanna say Thank you,
For being able to understand,
I never had to say a word,
You knew just when to lend a hand,
Today i wanna say Thank you,
Thanks for your hope and belief in me,
I'll be your strength when your down,
I'll always have faith in your dreams.
Today i wanna say Thank you,
For the person that you are,
I know one day that voice you've got,
Will turn you into a star!
Today i wanna say Thank you,
I don't think i say it enough,
You realise whats really important,
When the road you walk is rough.
Today i wanna say Thank you...
I love you like a sister and you need to know,
Today i wanna say Thank you...
Cause we don't always have tomorrow

[Doctor WHO]

Salam

This is really good bro if it's written by u .. as a start it's good :)

but for improvement .. I'd like 2 give u some comments :


- first of all for a poem it's wrong to separate each line with a comma unless it's a continuation which the comma is really a part of it

- u have 2 practice some rhyming :) cuz u'll use that alot in writing poems

- Another point .. is that u dont have to repeat sentences along the way
like ( Today I wanna say thank you ) .. u could have replaced that by another words .. like just deleting - today i wanna say - from some parts
and use Thank u - alone ... cuz u want the reader to enjoy reading what u write ... and repeating the words wont do u any good ! unless it's a chorus

- In this part :

Today i wanna say Thank you,
For being able to understand,
I never had to say a word,
You knew just when to lend a hand

- being able to understand - hmm i dont think it's a good sentence 2 use when ur describing the person u love ..
cuz the ability 2 understand should be present in all humans .. but 2 understand feelings .. we usually use : u felt what am goin thru
or .. ur heart feels that

u know these kinds of sentences ..
u can also say .. for ur understanding ... but i dont think it's a good idea 2 use that in a sweet poem ...

- finally i want u bro 2 focus on the words u use ... and the sentences ... if u writes sth .. go thru it again and again
u have to make sure that the lines r really joined 2gether ... the ideas and meanings r easy 2 understand and continuous ....

hmmm what else ?

that's all what i got right now ... cuz am a lil bit busy ..

but bro .. good work ,,, keep it up ! :)

ur sis Dr.WHO

[Doctor WHO]

I gave u a feedback btw !!!!

[متغرب بأمريكا]

Dr.Who

Thank you , your Suggesting is excellent

i am working in it

[نبتون]

Thanks buddy

Nice poem :)